so this is a biggie this post. its almost confessional.
I *heart* The Biggest Loser.
Love it. Hang out for. Hate saturdays. ( well not exactly hate...but..) Its a big deal for a supposed 'intellectual'. Supposedly, there's acceptable tv and then there's acceptable tv (and then theres national radio). Needless to say, I haven't mentioned my tv love affair at work.
When i was pregnant last year i started watching it when my belly became so big and uncomfortable ( 11.5 pounds of baby) that instead of the usual dinner table and conversation fare, i became an uncommunicative couch potato convert with dinner on the mound; bench seating at the dinner table was killing me. What was on the idiot box?...crappy news, black adder does archaeology and...yours truly. I never looked back. I have been forced ( by my own initial sense of shame) to 'deconstruct the love' in order to support the addiction.
I love seeing self directed change in people. I love to see the self realisation of the individual, the dawning of an inner strength; moving through doubt and self loathing. Even if its edited 'till the cows come home, im still there saying 'heck, its still a real transformation theyre having'. I really like to see people experiencing the benefits of healthful eating, the benefits of exercise, becoming observant of the slaves they had been to an 'unconscious' life. I know its extreme, but the process is a universal. It parallels somewhat my own dawning about 10 years ago; turning the observer in me into the doer. The realisation that if i put my mind to things, i could achieve. For me it was transforming the puff up the hill into a 10 km run. The day i became 'that woman' pounding the pavement with the double jogging pram and two kids and two whippets in tow (but firmly attached) and not the drive by woman observing the woman on the pavement running with the two kids and two dogs , i finally knew that i could steer my own destiny. That was my moment. Thats why i love this cheesy, feel good reality tv show. Im watching 'me' become 'me'.
Im finally learning to embrace my love, starting to declare it openly, just not yet at work. But im getting there.
But Im sure im not the only one with a secret reality tv show addiction...